


Risotto Day

by conceptstage



Series: Single Chapter Critical Role [24]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-03
Updated: 2019-06-03
Packaged: 2020-04-07 05:09:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19078129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/conceptstage/pseuds/conceptstage
Summary: Jester gets stood up but Beau comes to the rescue.





	Risotto Day

Jester frowned as she pushed the biscuit crumbs around on her plate with the tip of her finger, forming the shape of a dick. She sighed and looked over at the door across the room when it opened but a woman with long blonde hair walked in. She pouted and looked down at her phone, hoping for an ‘I’m almost there! Just pulling into the parking lot’ text to show up but there was none.

“Miss?” the half orc waiter said, getting her attention He was giving her a sympathetic smile. “Are you ready to order?”

She looked back down at her phone. “I’ll give him another minute.” She had said that seven minutes ago and then fourteen minutes before that.

“I’ll get you some more bread.”

She liked this guy, he knew what a girl in this situation really needed. She sighed heavily and glanced back down at her phone just in time to see a text pop up. ‘Sorry, Jester, I won’t be able to make it tonight. Something came up.’

Jester frowned. ‘This is the second date you’ve missed. Go fuck yourself.’ She sent it and tossed her phone into the purse on the floor. She sighed heavily and covered her face with her hands in embarrassment. She’d been stood up again. She felt tears of rage start to burn in the back of her eyes just as someone slid into the seat across from her, breathing deeply from running over.

“Sorry I’m late,” said a kind, feminine voice. Jester looked up and spotted a beautiful dark skinned woman with an undercut and a bun. There was an all-seeing eye tattooed under her ear and three piercings (three that Jester could see at least). She grinned and reached up to brush back a loose strand of hair. “Hope I didn’t keep you waiting for too long.”

Jester blinked in surprise. “Wh-Who are you?” She asked, keeping her voice to a whisper. “I think you might probably be at the wrong table technically.”

She grinned and unfolded the menu sitting in front of her. “Nope. I’m your date now. Name’s Beauregard.”

Jester blinked, still a little shocked. “Jester,” she said. The woman reached across the table and Jester took her hand, thinking that maybe she was going to shake it, but, instead, she leaned up to kiss the back of her fingers. Jester couldn’t help the nervous, yet delighted giggle that bubbled up in her throat and the woman, Beauregard, smiled proudly.

The waiter came over again and gave her new date a sour look. “Beau,” he said, his voice low. “What are you doing? You know what Dairon’s gonna say if she sees you fraternizing with the guests.”

“I’m off the clock, I’m out of uniform, I’m on a date. She has nothing to complain about. Weren’t you going to bring us bread?”

The half-orc rolled his eyes but reached over to the empty table behind her to move a small basket of rolls over in front of them. “Can I take your order?” he asked, forcing a fake smile at Beau, who was apparently his co-worker.

Beau hummed thoughtfully and looked at the menu. “What do you recommend?” she asked, teasingly.

“That you go fu-” He cut himself off and glanced at Jester out of the corner of his eye like he had forgotten that she was a customer. “Sorry, Ma’am,” he mumbled, before turning to Beau once more. “I recommend the lobster. Freshly caught this morning.”

Beau snorted. “That’s a lie. I’m the one who unpacked that delivery. I’ll have the ribs.”

Jester jumped when they both turned their eyes to her and she realized that she hadn’t even glanced at the menu. “Oh! What should I get?”

“You eat meat?” Beau asked, resting her chin on her open hand. Jester nodded and Beau reached over to point to something on the menu. “The risotto is probably the only non-frozen thing on the menu. The make it in a pot every couple days and, you’re in luck, today was risotto day so it’s fresh. The chicken is microwaved but the rice is pretty good. I’m getting the ribs because they drown it in so much sauce you can’t even tell it’s freezer burnt.”

Jester cleared her throat and gave Fjord a smile. “I’ll have the risotto. Thank you.”

The waiter nodded. “I’ll go put that in for you then.” He turned to leave and Beau called out to him. 

“And Fjord? Make it snappy if you want a tip, yeah?” The half orc lifted up the menus in his hand and flipped her off subtly under them. Beau laughed to herself. “Sorry,” she said, shaking her head. “I’m an asshole, he’s used to it. I’ll give him a good tip.”

Jester grinned at her, idly drawing the woman’s carefree smile on her napkin. “So, you work here?” she asked.

“Yeah, here on Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday nights, The Evening Nip every other night of the week. Then during the day I’m a librarian.”

Jester’s jaw dropped. “You have three jobs?”

Beau shrugged and nodded. “Three steady jobs. Ever since my parents… Well anyway, sometimes I do odd work and shit around town. Setting up for carnivals, selling turkey legs at Ren Faire, that kind of thing. What do you do?”

“I’m taking Art at Zadash U.” After that long list of jobs it sounded a little weak to just say ‘I’m a full time student with no bills’ but it was the truth so she wasn’t sure what else she could say.

Beau didn’t seem upset at least and just nodded. “Sweet, you’re an artist?”

Jester held up the doddle of Beau’s face that she’d been working on for the last few minutes and she gasped. “Fuck, that’s awesome! Can I have that?”

Jester nodded and slid it over. “There is a dick on the other side.”

Beau picked up the napkin and flipped it over, giving her an appreciative nod. “Not a bad dick. Just realistic enough to be funny but no so real that it looks gross. Very nice.”

Jester grinned. “Thank you.” No one ever showed her dicks the appreciation they deserved. “So, uh, why did you sit with me exactly? Not that I don’t want you here or anything!” she rushed to amend.

Beau didn’t seem put off and just nodded. “My shift was over and I was leaving but I saw you here and I just thought… she’s too damn pretty to be so sad on a Friday night, and, next thing I knew, I was sitting down. I barely remember even making the decision. You know, if you do actually want me to leave it won’t hurt my feelings, I’d completely understand.”

Jester shook her head and smiled kindly. “No. I want to you stay.” Beau grinned happily and Jester felt her stomach flutter nervously at the sight.

They talked for hours, long after their empty plates had gone cold. It wasn’t until Fjord walked over with an exasperated sigh that they realized how late it had gotten. “Yo, Beau, can you pay so that I can close out your table and go home?”

Beau looked down at her phone, abandoned on the corner of the table hours ago, and hissed through her teeth. “Fuck, man, yeah. Sorry.” She pulled her wallet out of her back pocket and pulled out a wad of rumbled bills, and Jester realized suddenly that those were her tips from today.

“Let me get it,” Jester said, pulling her purse up off the floor to sit in her lap.

“Nope, nope, I crashed your dinner, I’m paying for it.”

“No really, it’s fine, I have my momma’s credit card and-”

“Nope, I’ve got it.”

Fjord rolled his eyes. “You’re ridiculous,” he muttered. 

“Beau,” Jester said, pulling her hand out of her purse to put it on Beau’s wrist and stop her. “Please. Let me get it. You can get the next one.”

Beau froze and glanced up at her, her eyes wide. “Next one?”

“Unless you don’t-”

“No! I do, I really do. I’ve just never been on a second date before, I was surprised.” She hesitated, but then slowly started putting her cash back in her wallet as Jester handed over her credit card. While Fjord was gone, the women exchanged numbers and when he came back, Jester was trying to convince Beau that she would cover the tip but Beau was furiously pulling bills out of her wallet once more.

“Fjord!” she said, when she met his eyes. She practically threw the money at him before Jester could write the tip in on the receipt he handed her.

Fjord sighed and picked up the loose bills off the floor. “For fucks sake, you’re hopeless. Do you both have a ride? The buses are closed now.”

Jester cleared her throat and nodded. “I texted my driver a little while ago, he’s waiting outside. Beau, do you need a ride?”

Beau’s brain had stopped when Jester said ‘driver’ so Fjord answered for her. “She’s going downtown, probably the opposite way of you. I’ll get her home alright.”

Jester nodded and stood up and Beau hurried to help her with her coat. Jester grinned and kissed Beau’s cheek, feeling a twirl of warmth in the chest when Beau's dark skin turned even darker red. “I’ll text you?” she asked, starting for the door.

Beau nodded, stunned, until Fjord elbowed her in the side. “Make sure she gets to her car alright,” he whispered.

“Ah, Jester! I’ll walk you out!”

Fjord was shaking his head as they both left the restaurant but he couldn’t help the fond smile that came to his face at the sight of his best friend so happy for the first time in a long time. He didn’t even mind it when she spent the entire drive to their neighborhood gushing about Jester.


End file.
